i'm not a bad guy, i swear

Disclaimer: Before you begin, I want you to know that I'm going to offend a lot of people and create a bad impression. My words are in jest and I don't really mean it to the exact degree that I'm describing. I'm just exaggerating for comical effect. Plus, I was coming off of no sleep when I made these observations. Tread carefully... over my face after you're done.

The other day in my language and culture class, the professor separated us into groups for reading discussions. The prior night, I stayed awake, burning coal throughout the night, to finish the midterm paper for this class. I was completely deranged by that point in the day. Since I spent the whole night writing the paper, I didn't get a chance to do the reading for the class. Instead of participating in the discussion, I just sat off to the side and observed the members in the group.

In my exhausted and sleep-deprived state, I came to a stunning revelation. Why are all the women in my class unattractive? There is not a single girl that I would consider good looking in any way.

Anthropology is one of those fields where you can either find women who have the girl-next-door complex with sexy librarian appeal or think you've stumbled upon the greatest anthropological discovery of the 21st century: Bigfoot wearing women's clothing... after a horrific disfiguring traffic accident involving 56 consecutive blows to face with an ugly stick. [This is the part where I am completely exaggerating. Press Ctrl+W to submit angry replies]

To better illustrate this point, the "girl" that was sitting directly in front of me was the prime example of the graphic description. I say "girl" because a) she totally looked a man with the masculine haircut and facial structure and b) she had more leg hair than I did. Granted, my leg hair is possibly the worst example of a hairy leg possible, but trust me this girl had me considering writing my Nobel Prize acceptance letter for Best Discovery.

OK OK. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe the deprivation played tricks with my mind and their "beauty" was lost on me. I'll take another cursory glance during the next session. I'm not holding out for much hope though.


and i thought my jokes were bad

I was humming a tune while walking to class the other day when something completely out of the blue occurred. I think I was singing the falsetto part to some song quietly when the guy in front of me turns away and gives me a funny look. You know the kind of look you have when you observe something that boggles your mind, like a guy making his own sandwich or something.

I felt really self-conscious and had a shifty eye moment for a while. Sometimes I forget that people can hear me when I hum. This one time back in third grade, I was humming while waiting in line to go out to recess. All of a sudden, the teacher whips around and asked loudly, "Who is humming?" OH SCHNAP!?! Up to that point in my life, I never knew people could hear me while I hummed. I wasn't familiar with the whole sound waves and physics of the thing. Who knew?

They need to come up with some sort of invisibility cloak for this sort of situation. Crushing blow to my self-esteem. Plus, I need to stop humming embarrassing songs.


change we can believe in

You know those people who speak with their mouths but not by their actions? I feel like my boss is one of those people. I don't quite understand what she is being paid to do because she doesn't do much of anything. She passes all of the work onto the interns and sits in her office making personal calls. Some snippets of what I've heard include the tale of her dog running away, the boyfriend troubles of her girlfriend and the facade that the office must maintain. She's always away on "meetings." I wonder if a visit to the hair salon counts as a business expense... Ok enough about my gripes with my boss. What I really want to focus on is my thoughts on working in an office that has an environmental initiative.

The irony here is that even though the main focus of my office is to "green" other businesses, we still maintain an unsustainable office space. Plastic ware, Styrofoam cups, mass consumption of paper, and lack of energy efficient appliances. I can't help but feel like a hypocrite when I speak on the phone to business owners who are legitimately working to make the community more sustainable.

That's the issue though. Are businesses doing this to improve the community and promote environmental sustainability? Or are they just looking to improve their bottom line? I've thought about it many times in the office while I spin around in my chair. I think this relates to Noel's sermon about shrewdness. By cutting costs in areas that can be improved, businesses are indirectly offsetting their impact on the environment. That's what I want, or that's the goal of my job. I remember talking to my friend Ray about how "green" is marketing term to promote "eco-friendly" methods of production, consumption and business ethics. Although the true intent may not be to promote environmental sustainability as much as to promote increased revenue shares; the concept still serves a purpose.

I used to be so gung-ho about the environment, but I feel like my views are beginning to shift. Even if there isn't a catastrophic global climate change waiting to wipe out humanity, I feel there are many benefits to living a non-volatile, sustainable lifestyle. There is real beauty in mimicking nature.

Go Green!

coffeehouse spirituality

Sharing thoughts on faith and spirituality over a cup of joe is probably one of my favorite things to do now. The other night, a friend and I connected over a cup of coffee. It was one of those rare conversations, where I was able to lay my cards on the table and talk about anything. I think we both saw ourselves as two guys in the same or similar situation. After talking to him, I realized that there are a few things in my life that I need to work on or change. For example, I was really encouraged by how vocal he was about his faith. I think that was the point that I took away the most from that night. Maybe it's just me, but I often am reluctant to let others that I'm unfamiliar with know that I'm Christian. It has something to do with my fear of being labeled as a close-minded, intolerant, Bible-thumper. It's not an image that I want branded on me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not ashamed of being Christian. I just don't think I fit that label because I'm nothing like that in person. In fact, I'm probably more liberal than most Christians ought to be.
I'll just chew on it for a while.

I need to buy a traveler's mug for coffee, but I don't know where I should buy it from. Should I buy one from Starbucks? Biggby? Caribou? I don't know where I want to place my allegiance. I do need one rather soon though. I feel guilty of purchasing coffee in a disposable cup because that goes against my sustainability ethos. Plus the coffee in the office is terrible. I didn't think it was possible to make coffee taste that bad. Even instant coffee taste better than that liquid crap.