I don't quite understand dentists. I completely dread the two days a year when I find myself reclined in a chair with a stranger's hand shoved down my throat. Perhaps the negativity stems from the invasion of privacy (it's my mouth...gross), the lingering odor of disinfectants and what I can only assume is the rotting stench from the pile of collected teeth, or quite simply the pain and torture that is afflicted on my poor teeth. I'm positively convinced the dental hygienist are only one step below serial killers. With some professional training, they could make a career out of their skills with the CIA torturing war criminals. The idea of trusting my dental hygiene to a person with a high school diploma is mind boggling. Guess it shouldn't surprise me that I often walk away from the cleaning with various holes in my gum line from "oops" and "uh-ohs." Lousy sadists.